Dr. Brame is a bona-fide pioneer of the kinky community, but she is just as down-to-earth and easy going as anybody could wish for! She also has a great sense of humor, and talking to her was a real treat.
Maybe you are new to kink, and don't recognize the name of this writer, board-certified sexologist and sex therapist with a Ph.D. in human sexuality. This is one of the downsides to the explosive growth in the kink community in this Internet age: we move so fast, we are losing our history. Most of us don't even know where we came from, or that we owe Dr. Brame a debt for helping to get us here.
So, no, Fifty Shades of Grey did not invent BDSM. Neither did Gloria Brame, but she was among the first to campaign against the stigma attached to BDSM and fetish sex. Different Loving rocked the world, and today it is used in classrooms to teach about human sexuality.
Today, so many of us just jump on the computer and in a few clicks, we can find just about any fetish or kink you can possibly imagine -- and some that you never dreamed of.
But for those of us who began in the dark ages, back when you started out all alone, thinking you were the only person in the world who ever got excited by a swat on your ass, the world was a much colder and scarier place. Nobody ever talked about this stuff, and your only hope of hooking up with a like-minded pervert was posting personal ads in swingers' magazines and sneaking around adult bookshops. If you had the courage, that is. A lot of us didn't. When I first became aware of what was then called "S&M," I honestly thought it was something the porn industry made up. Surely, I thought, real people didn't do this stuff… did they?
Then Dr. Brame came along and told us, yes, real people did this and it was okay. Having real research on who we are and what we do helped so many of us take those first steps in fulfilling our fantasies and feeling okay about it.
As I told Dr. Brame on the podcast, Different Loving was the first non-fiction book on BDSM I ever read, so she's at least partly responsible for the happy, well-adjusted pervert I am today. (There are a lot of men — and a few women — out there who owe her a thank-you!)
Since Different Loving, Dr. Brame has written several other books, including Come Hither, A Common-Sense Guide to Kinky Sex, The Truth about Sex, and Sex for Grown-ups. Her newest book, Naked Memory: Confessions of a Sexual Revolutionary, is just out and I can't wait to read her very personal story. Check out her website, www.gloriabrame.com, to find out more about her work.
Seriously, check out our conversation on www.kinkycast.com. It's a very enjoyable episode. I even got to ask her about the Swiss Cheese Pervert.
No, I'm not gonna explain that. You'll have to listen to the podcast!
Listening is easy and free…. you can listen anytime you want, while driving, folding the laundry, grocery shopping…. on your computer, or your phone or laptop or whatever mobile device you might be carrying around these days.